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20 March 2008 @ 12:06 am
"Did you see that video of Dominic Monaghan at his photography show?"
"OF COURSE HE'S a photographer. EVERY celeb has to go through an artsy photography phase."
"He was like, 'My show should be called I Love Billy Boyd!' And I was like, okay, Dom, you slash yourself."

"Why are we talking about Lord of the Rings again?!"
"Because our anniversary is imminent and we feel the need to come full circle?"
"Haha, remember back in the day, when we were in fandom? When BitOfEarth exploded?"
"I remember you told me that, and I was like, 'Oh man, this Mel girl is really on top of things with the internet! She is really into this fandom deal! I am glad I am friends with her!'"
"Oh god, really?"

"I have Vampire stuck in my head. Let's listen to it! Right now!"
"Good plan!"
"Oh my god, this song was literally written about Angel."
"Oh my god they just said 'brooding'!"
"It's settled."

The song in question...

I am a vampire
I am a vampire
I am a vampire
I am a vampire
I am a vampire
I am a vampire
I have lost my fangs

I am a vampire
I am a vampire
I am a vampire
I have lost my fangs

So I'm sad and i feel lonely
So I cry and I'm very angry
And I hate some girl lately
So I'm so no more sad and
ache yeah yeah

I am a vampire and I am looking in the city
Pretty girls don't look at me
Don't look at me
Cause I don't have my fangs
but I have lost my fangs

I am a vampire
I am a vampire
I have lost my mouth again
I am a vampire
I am a vampire
I have lost my mouth again

So I get bored and I shred
So I fuck all and I brood some place
And I sing with my best looking
And I want to play the guitar
But my guitar is out of tune
I am a vampire
I am looking in the cd
And the musical don't play with me
Don't play with me

Because I don't play with my mouse again
And I have lost my mouse again

Annnd, I can't remember any more. Feel free to edit. We need to get this thing going again.
Me: Did you see the continued wank on my journal that I HAD TO CALL AN END TO?!
Mel: YES
Mel: omg talk about keep it in your pants. er.
Mel: i love how wank has even spread to the peaceful hippiescape that is your lj
Mel: clearly gay dumbles is like the wankpocalypse

Me: ::is peeing self::
Current Mood: amusedamused

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Rodney To!

  1. Louisa May Alcott, author of 'Little Rodney To', hated Rodney To and only wrote the book at her publisher's request!
  2. All the moons of the Solar System are named after characters from Greek and Roman mythology, except the moons of Uranus, which are named after Rodney To.
  3. It takes a lobster approximately 7 years to grow to be Rodney To!
  4. Rodney To is the last letter of the Greek alphabet.
  5. Rodney To can drink over 25 gallons of water at a time!
  6. Rodney To can usually be found in nests built in the webs of large spiders!
  7. If every star in the Milky Way was a grain of salt they would fill Rodney To!
  8. Rodney To is the world's smallest mammal.
  9. It took Rodney To 22 years to build the Taj Mahal!
  10. The Asteroid Belt between Mars and Jupiter is made entirely of Rodney To!
I am interested in - do tell me about
Current Location: dude.
25 November 2006 @ 03:18 am
Y'know, that Halloween episode where they all turn into their costumes.

Buffy [to Angel]: But I liked the man with the musket! Do you have a musket?
We die of laughter.
Mel: Okay, this is so much funnier than it would be if I wasn't so tired!

[Willow walks through a wall and Giles throws a spazz. I make Mel pause it so I can laugh hysterically.]

Later, we are discussing those scary pro-ana communites that are unfortunate and bother me alot, and Fiona Apple.

Me: Yeah, so Paper Bag. That's the song that all the pro-ana girls quote in their profiles and think it's Tori Amos.
Mel: How in hell do they think it's Tori Amos?! It's too intelligent to be Tori Amos! Tori's pro-ana song would be like this, "hunger iz liek butterfliez rushin thru da perple skiez."
Me: "who liek 2 eet fetta cheez on sunday afternoonz"!!!!!
Mel: "the sandwiches are marching away from me thru the space coloniez"!!

duuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrr paper BAG duuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrr


And then MEl found out about the Buffy Animated Series and we died. The End.
Current Mood: crazycrazy
09 August 2006 @ 12:13 am
Fragments of Awesome:

"Oh Sweeney, your wife was so not blonde and pale. She is totally Italian."


"Sweeney only dates blondes."
"So his wife like, dyed her hair and powdered her skin. And somehow it seeped into her child."
"Johanna was like a DNA mistake. She's a mutant!"
"Her powers are playing the cello and flying."

"Perfect. Isn't Izzie Johanna?"
"Izzie is the beggar woman! The Judge lusted after Sweeney's wife too. The Judge lusts after everyone. The Judge would even put it in Patti LuPone."
"Put it in Patti LuPone!"
"That is my new eljay subtitle."

"Addison would be Pirelli."
"She would be so adorable!"
"She would have little braids! And play the accordian. And she would get to bitch slap George."
"Which she does already."

"Every time we try to talk about mutants the phone dies."
Current Location: toby!
Current Mood: gratefulgrateful
Current Music: fucking loud crickets or whatever shut UP
26 June 2006 @ 01:45 am
"Shae, you will do fine. You will do absolutely fine, and you'll come home and rest, and your jaw won't hurt at all and you'll be totally better within a day and oh my god my thumb just, like, broke in half."

Because we're giggly, giggly people.
Current Mood: contemplativecontemplative
17 June 2006 @ 11:21 pm
So, all, hello. Shae here, reporting from the spinny chair that Mel and I are currently sharing. (Mel says, "That sounds dirty.") We would like to tell you all about our amazing adventures in East Bumblefuck oops I mean Bridgeton, New Jersey (which we CANNOT EVER make fun of, apparently), but it would take too long to type everything amazing we did, so we have PICTURES. To SHOW YOU. Mel will now make a list of Highlight Things, and then our photo blog will begin. Also, apparently, I just made made a strange noise.

[MEL] Seriously guys. It was so special. You don't even understand. Shae just coughed on me.

Important Things
*Fried oreos! Seriously. You know you're in bumblefuck when there are friend oreos. And they can't spell the sign correctly.

*CORNFIELDS. And irrigation systems. Everywhere. And apple trees. It wouldn't be quite as disturbing except Ani DiFranco, what are you doing here? I don't know.

*There was a house in the middle of a field. Just...by itself. I don't know.

*Shae told us stories about her amazing cross-country road trip when she was 13, ask her sometime.

*We saw a viking. A giant pink viking. I honestly think it was the highlight of my life thus far.

*We sort of couldn't figure out where the folk festival was, so we ended up driving around and apparently there is a Bridgeton Zoo. With three ducks and two llamas and a swan. Where people go to for fun, or something. We didn't get any llama pictures. Cries.

*The actual festival itself was teeny weeny and pretty much made up of old confused hippie men, lesbian couples, and...that's pretty much it, actually. And us and our friend George.

*We saw Ana-Lucia play guitar. More on that later.

*George is our friend. He saved us FRONT ROW SEATS to see Ani. He loves Ani DiFranco too. He is our friend.

*We could see her sweat, seriously.

Okay pics.

The Scintillating Shindig of Mel and Shae and Ana-Lucia and Ani DiFranco and George. Who is not pictured, but is here in spirit. HE is our friend. Seriously. You should look behind this cut.Collapse )

In conclusion, we are awesome.
Current Location: Mel's chair
Current Mood: crazyeating peach cobbler so crazy.
I should tell you, I don't know how to write songs.


(Also, later, I'm totally posting The Amazing Adventures of the Melasaurus and the Shaeasaurus and-- OH MY GOD, Kait's dinosaurs! Mel, it's come full circle! What's wrong with us?!-- and also our crazy-ass Rent photo caption things with Benny the bald preacher.)
Current Location: Ohio. In my imaginayshun.
Current Mood: crappyemo tearz
Current Music: Just Some Guy- WHY.
"You know what I really want to see? Hedwig and the Angry Inch."
"Me too. Except I always get confused as to whether it's Inch or Itch. Because I've seen it both ways."
"It's Inch! Because there's one inch of penis!"
"Okay, most blunt explanation ever. But seriously, that's what the whole show is about. It doesn't belong to any character. It's just a one inch penis with wings! It flies around the stage, doing nothing."
"It's name is Anthony Rapp!"

"Because you know, Anthony only has one inch of penis."
"Rodney keeps has the rest of it in a drawer. Because he bit it off. Because, obviously, he's become some sort of Asian vampire."

"Did you pee? Was it a successful mission?"
"Ahaha, Shae, Anthony never has a successful mission, because he sees that he has no penis and he cries!"
"Wait, hold on, let me type that!"
"Shae, are you actually transcribing our conversations? I feel like I'm being watched by a government agency."
"It's like I belong to... what is it? No Child Left Behind!"
"No, it's not! That's just about Anthony's penis! Because it always gets left behind!"

"I saw Tori Amos here! I wonder if she left her flower smoking pot thing?"

"My brain is totally sparkly. Except for the parts that are sad, those parts are green. Because Elphaba's emo!"

"I'm such a nerd. I'm a bitter, bitter nerd."

"It's tru-- OH MY GOD."

"My secret... is that Tim Curry actually scares me."
"Aww. Hey, look, lot's of pictures of Tim Curry!"
"Mel, have you ever seen Rocky Horror? We should watch it. Tim Curry's a transvestite, and his lips are a force of nature."
"Ahahaha, oh, Angel. 'Mah parents kicked me ouuuuttt.'"
"Yes, 'But then I found Rocky Horror, and I became a sweet transvestite.'"

"Oh, Sara Ramirez. You're so awesome on Grey's."
"Shae, Sara should be on X-Men! She would be an awesome mutant. And George would be like... the sweet cuddly mutant who everyone loves! All of Grey's Anatomy should be on X-Men!"
"Mutant Hospital!"
"Oh, my god, yes, because it already is! It would be a medical soap opera with powers, because it's really already just a soap opera, they only added powers as an excuse for existing. And Mutant Hospital would be about slutty interns with powers, because that's all Grey's Anatomy is about."
"Fredi would produce it."

"Anthony Rapp's penis is strangely similar to Professor X. It is crippled and alone, in a wheelchair, void of its mutant powers. And sometimes, every now and then, it gets up and walks around, but no one ever finds out."
"Mel, you totally know that's what Rodney's nickname for Anthony's penis is. PROFESSOR X."
"Oh my god, Shae, I'm never going to be able to watch X-Men again without picturing Professor X as some giant penis in a wheelchair!"

"THEY DO. Because Chris Columbus is both of them, like totally some Hitler."
"OH LORD, he's Hitler!"

"Oh god, I can't breathe."
"We're so cracked out. Seriously, we're so much more cracked out than usual. I think Mimi... cracked us... with infections of love."
"Infections of Love! It's like Seasons of Love, but so much better!"
"Oh my god, you know what would be the best thing ever? If all the drug addicts came out and sang Seasons of Love! Only it was Infections of Love! And then Maureen came out like, 'I want to sing!' Only Joanne was like, 'Will you have sex with me, instead?' Because THAT'S ALL THEY EVER DO."

"I'm not bothering with type anymore, I'm just making a list."
"Why are you so OCD?! My god! Wait, why am I accusing you of that?"

"What the crap is this gallery? 'The Last Ten Years'? What the fuck is that?"
"What's that supposed to be? Like, a much longer, much more angsty telling of the marriage of Jamie and... oh my god, what was her name? Sally? Wait, no! Why can't I remember her name?! Oh, Cathy. Did Sara play Cathy in the new and improved L5Y?"
"I hope it's not, that would be ghetto."
"Shae, they get married! And divorced! Again! Because they never had sex. And you totally know they didn't."
"They didn't, for real."
"OH MY GOD, Mel! It's Adam Pascaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal! With Sara Ramirez!"
"Did he play Jamie? No wait, he played Cathy!"
"Adam, you're such a woman! Jesus."
"Come on, he's got the eyelashes for it!"

"Mel we've been talking for 54 minutes and 22 seconds and counting!"
"Why are you a government agent?!... And that's almost an hour! I love how I can't math."

"Stay on the line, Mel! We're almost there, Mel! Almost there!"
"I have to goooooooooo! My phone's beeping continuously!"
"So, to review! This is my list!
-Mutant hospital
-soap opera powers
-slutty intern
-Professor X- wheelchair
-giant penis in wheelchair
-CC is Hitler
-Infections of Love
"I think the last one is definitely my favorite. It wins at everything."
Current Mood: hyperhyper
25 February 2006 @ 02:47 pm
"Aaagh, there something gross floating in my water! I think it's Anthony Rapp."

"Shae, I just love Jesse L. Martin sooooo much. Seriously, I wish he were my best friend. He makes me smile. I think if I lived with Jesse L. Martin, I wouldn't need antidepressants anymore, I'd just walk out of my bedroom door, and be like, OMG HAPPY."
"And I'd be there, too, with Tracie, because they're already BFF anyway. It'd be like a commune."

"I love Jesse L. Martin. He's like Jesus. Oh my god, he is Jesus!"
"Shae, we're going to start a Jesse L. Martin religion one day. And then Anthony Rapp will be really jealous because we didn't start one for him, the selfish bastard. Oh well, he can be like, a demigod or something."
"Martinism! Mel, we'll be Martinists! Like those Elvis people!"
"No, we have to have the "L." The "L" is necessary. So we'd be L. Martinists."
"Did you know that the "L" stands for Lamont, which is what his family calls him?"
"Lamont?! Are you serious?! Jesse L. Martin, I love you. You're Jesus."

"Tom Collins is my drink of choice. How do you make a Tom Collins? I'll bet Angel says that all the time."
"I used to know how to make a Tom Collins... but then I forgot."
"Shae, you should be a bartender in the city."
"I totally should. I'd be like one of those dykey bartenders."
"With a gay bar."
"Of course!"
"And Jesse L. Martin would be there, because he should. With Tracie."
"And Kristin and Idina could be there. Avoiding Taye, even though we love him because he's so bald."
"Wilson wouldn't be there, because he'd be like, 'Oh my god, there are gay people here! And I am SO OBVIOUSLY NOT ONE OF THEM. YES, I AM THE EPITOME OF STRAIGHTNESS."
"Wilson, we love you."
"Anthony would come with Adam Rodney!"
"Well, yes."
"And then Bono would be there, too, making out with The Edge because he can."
[other things I can't remember go here]
"Seriously, that band has so much angst. They should just break up."
"Except then Mr. Dugan might possibly suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder and then DIE."
"I heard a rumour that they were breaking up one time and I nearly fainted. I was all breathing weird, and my dad was like, 'Chill.'"
"Oh, U2. You have no point."

That was inspired by this previous conversation:
deliriumrosie (10:20:41 PM): WHY DO I KEEP GETTING EMAILS FROM BONO.
spirtelyshadow (10:20:46 PM): !
spirtelyshadow (10:20:49 PM): that two timing slutman
deliriumrosie (10:20:58 PM): Well, really, the ONE campaign, but BONO.
deliriumrosie (10:21:07 PM): Like Idina. Except not a man.
spirtelyshadow (10:21:08 PM): it's just him, in a room, alone
deliriumrosie (10:21:14 PM): TOTALLY.
spirtelyshadow (10:21:21 PM): he is one, but he is not the same
spirtelyshadow (10:21:26 PM): or...something
deliriumrosie (10:21:30 PM): Like, "ZOMG AIDS AND PO' FOLK! ::saves::"
deliriumrosie (10:21:34 PM): HAHAH.
spirtelyshadow (10:21:37 PM): oh, u2
deliriumrosie (10:21:54 PM): The Edge loves Bono.
deliriumrosie (10:22:01 PM): They should be lovers.
deliriumrosie (10:22:12 PM): OMG, I bet there's been U2 RPS written.
deliriumrosie (10:22:40 PM): Like, "The band has a dramatic falling out when The Edge and Bono decide to tragically end their relationship ANGST."
spirtelyshadow (10:23:35 PM): omg it's funny because it almost probably actually happened
deliriumrosie (10:23:44 PM): Totally.
spirtelyshadow (10:23:45 PM): i bet kirryn would write it, if i asked nicely
deliriumrosie (10:24:03 PM): They were like, "I WISH I KNEW HOW TO QUIT YOU ZOMG."
spirtelyshadow (10:24:05 PM): oh bono/everyone. yourloveissoirishandangry
spirtelyshadow (10:24:25 PM): ahahahah i have to go
spirtelyshadow (10:24:33 PM): because i'm in deep shit if i don't study this
deliriumrosie (10:24:40 PM): And then.. they made a movie about it, except with cowboys instead of Irish sunglass-wearing crazies.

Back to the phone:
"Oh look, how cute, there's Jesse being adorable with Tracie. Aww, they love each other!"
"No, he doesn't love her. He's being like that because he's Jesus and Jesus has to be adorable with all the... little people."

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See! Look how cute they are!

"Aww, look, there's Tracie and Idina. Being gay. Except Idina loves Kristin more. Pink goes good with green!"

"Adam, why are your children named Lennon and Montgomery?"
"Oh my god, those were seriously the names of those preppy Connecticut people my aunt was telling me about on the phone. They're going to grow up and start wearing pink polos with popped collars."
"For serious."

"Hey, look, Jesse L. Martin without a beard! What is he doing without a beard?! I think my whole world just died a little! Grow your beard back, Jesse! We like you better when you're Jesus!"

"Fredi did wardrobe for Cats and Phantom?!"
"........... I HATE CATS."
"........... ME TOO. SERIOUSLY."
Current Mood: melancholyive missed u emo tears cries.
Current Music: Our crazy is eating my brain.